A Blurry Night Before Christmas

Cartoon Santa covering one eye‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
My stocking was hung by the chimney with care,
But I ripped it right down when I tripped on the chair.

Then out on the lawn I heard such a clatter,
I rose from the floor to see what was the matter.
Approaching the window, I stuck my head through the sash,
Since I’d closed it before, it made quite a crash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Glittered brightly on the shards of glass below
Then, what to my squinting eyes should appear,
But a blurry little sleigh, and eight limping reindeer.

With a little old driver and a temper so quick,
I hoped against hope that it wasn’t Saint Nick.
But that’s who it was, and he gave me the blame,
As he whistled and shouted and called me by name!

“Hasn’t anyone told you your eyesight needs fixin’?
Look what you’ve done to Donder and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! To the top of the wall!
Let’s get out of here quick before this guy kills us all!”

So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of toys, and Saint Nicholas, too.
As I dabbed at my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney Saint Nicholas came with a bound.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled my stocking, then turned with a jerk.
And covering one eye with a red-gloved hand,
Said, “Son, give yourself the gift of a vision exam!”

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, as he flew into the night . . .


© Dan Roberts, 2018